Posted by myg
I was laid up in that crusty stankhole of a hospital for a couple of days at least before I was able to even sit up in bed. I was so weak I could hardly scratch my neck.
I practiced lifting my eyelids for a few seconds, just to check if I could still do it. Every time I woke up he was there.
Nobody was allowed in to see me and Dr. Altamura made sure that nobody did. It was the first time in a long time I felt at all safe.
Of course, it was a drag that Alex and Sable couldn’t get in–I know Alex was pretty upset. So upset in fact he decided it was finally time to move in together. I didn’t know how to tell him I wasn’t sure I’d ever be moving out of the hospital.
I’d been corrupted, Altamura thought, in the attack by the digital ghosts. He just didn’t know if I could be repaired. And I felt so exhausted I almost didn’t have the energy to care.
“Dr. Altamura, what do you think happens when we die?” I asked him one night. I wondered if it hurt. I wondered if I’d miss myself after I was gone, or if there’d be any trace or imprint of me anywhere on the grid. He didn’t want to talk philosophyction though. Just facts.
“Can you tell me exactly what happened to you that night Miss March?” I hated when he called me that.
“Not exactly. I can’t remember too much of anything right now doc.”
“I know it’s hard – it’s part of the syndrome. But try. It’s important.”
I thought for a minute, then was flooded with pain. “I got off the subway and was being attacked, but I couldn’t see anything.” I winced with the memory of being blindsided. I could feel the assault all over again.
“Did you hear anything?”
“Wind,” I said. “But it didn’t sound much like normal wind. It sounded like funny words.”
“Words? What words?” he scribbled on his pad. I tried to remember. Then it began to come back to me. The book – the words – the attack.
“Um, something, sanatorium, daemonicious, something, vertegratis? I could see them when the nekos came.”
“Yeah, the nekos. They scared them off. Were those ghosts some kind of memory fragment?”
“The words – did they mean anything to you?” He seemed real interested now.
“Well sort of…” I thought of the book – the book I’d probably never find now. The title had been on that paper the nekos snagged from me. I’d been warned not to tell anyone about it, but he was my doctor. Surely he had to keep things in confidence? I hesitated.
“Do you want to live Mygdala?”
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“Then you’ve got to let me help you.”